Yesterday my son and I went to what was supposed to be a Christmas Concert at Glyndebourne. This was our experience and I know there are others out there who will disagree with me, which is their right.
Will either of us ever go back again – NEVER.
We live in London but Glyndebourne was one of those places that had been on our Bucket List so we thought it would be a lovely thing thing to do with Christmas coming up, so, despite the dreadful weather we went. We had booked a box for two people and taken our own Picnic Basket to eat in the Marquee. To find that our name wasn’t on the list to eat in the Marquee, but it all turned out to be alright, because we had been upgraded to the “Posh” Marquee for some reason. So in we went, and were told to unpack our picnic and start eating, which we did. Other people did the same. We had bought out food from Marks and Spencer and that’s when our first problem became obvious.
Our selection of cold meats, breads, cheese, cracker, and other finger food just didn’t match up to the foods that the other people, who obviously came every year just didn’t match up to the food the other people had, and our poor Colin the Caterpiller Cakes – well they signed our Death Warrant in that Marquee – let me tell you. You could hear poor Colin sobbing his little eyes out back in London!!! There was one man, dressed in evening dress with his wife, who had brought a container full of ‘his’ home made soup, his home grown chopped herbs, containers of salt and ground pepper.
This is the same man, who wore a bright pink tie, matching pink cuff links and matching bright pink socks of course!
Anyway, we were allowed to leave our Picnic baskets in the Marque and walk into the Hall. Hall? hall? That place in like – lets just say it’s enormous and you need a Guide Book to find your way around – and that’s if your’e lucky. So Jack and I are looking for Red 20. When we finally found it I felt like shouting out Bingo! I need a toilet Mum he said. Be back in minute. Minute? I sat there, and sat there. I started to wonder if I would ever see the poor soul again!! Finally he re-appeared and we sat on a bench outside Red Door where our Box was, bearing in mind we had booked a Private Box for two.
Lovely lady on the door. She told us the time the doors open. No problem there, then she said But it might be – this time – oe that time – – or on the other hand it could be……….
I got visions of a a very old t.v. series I used to watch and loved. It was an off shoot of Are You Being Served but it was called Are You Being Served Again!!!
In the end it was a completely different time!!!
I admit my patience was starting to wear just the slightest bit thin.
Can I search your bag? says another young man. Bearing in mind I’ve only got a very small handbag.
“What for?” I asked politely bearing in mind you can’t get a thing in it hardly except a handkerchief and my reading glasses.
“We had Just Oil in here” he said looking proud of himself bearing in mind I was feeling fed up by this time and snapped back “Really, back in London we cope with people who carry Bombs!!!”
So onwards are upwards to our Private Box. That’s when Jack was ready to give us, but as your know I do not give. I fight my corner and I fight to win.
This so called private box was so small that when the two of us were in it,, we couldn’t stand up. TRUTH. We were supposed to have two chairs. What we actually had were Two bar stools. TRUTH. One in front of the other. I am 72 years old, and I’m not very tall. So I couldn’t get up on mine. When I finally did, the supposed Private Box was so small that I was actually learning up against Jack’s knees and making his uncomfortable. When we called for the Manager, and asked to be moved to a more suitable box, we were told NO. So we said that’s fine then, just give us a refund, and we’ll go home. We were told NO. When I told her than I will go to every Newspaper out there and tell us how you treated us, she suddenly found us a box for two with a restricted view and two Chairs. However, they were still wooden chairs.
So yes, I will accept that we did book a box of two, but we were told that we could move our seats around. Move the seats around? You are joking!!! Stools that are so high that you can’t get up on and your feet are dangling off the end of. Plus if you book a box – you haven’t got a door on it – from what I remember – you kind of walk along – turn – walk down a step and there you are!!!!!
No thanks Glyndebourne – we’ll stick to London in future.